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How to Use a Wand Vibrator | Five steps to your perfect solo date

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Sometimes, we find ourselves needing to unwind. If we are currently in a dry spell we may find ourselves settling for that person in the bar or hitting up our one-night stand from last month. But a solo date can bring just as much – if not more – pleasure.

Le Wand
Le Wand is a Great Option for a Solo Date

An orgasm has incredible benefits for our physical and mental health and we need them in order to be healthy both mentally and physically, but sometimes they can be so hard to come by when you rely on someone else to give you one!

Realising that, after all, you don’t need another person to get an orgasm, has to be one of the most empowering moments in life. 

Learning the ins and outs of our own bodies and how to give ourselves those earth-shattering, blow-the-roof-off-the-house orgasms will not only keep you from having the awkward DTR (Define-The-Relationship) conversation with that person, but it will set you free!

When you know how to please yourself, you do not have to settle for second best. Later, when you are with a partner you will know exactly what you want them to do which makes a better time for you as a couple. There are a lot of options out there, so how do you know where to start?

We have a great list of wand vibrators to choose from but once you have done your research, made your purchase, and it is sitting in front of you, what do you do with your wand vibrator? Let’s take it step by step.

Step 1: Get comfortable 

Especially if you are new to the art of pleasing yourself, you need to make sure that you are in the right headspace. I like to give myself a nice date night, I’ll make a nice dinner, open a bottle of wine, do some reading or gentle yoga.

Magic Wand Neck Massage
Wands are great massage devices

If you’re nervous you can prepare the atmosphere – turn down the lights, keep a good pillow nearby (we’ll come back to that later) and spend some time to make sure that you’re comfortable. Treat yourself the way you want to be treated while you are on a date!

Wands are great massage devices. If you are feeling a little overwhelmed, you can always start with your neck and shoulders. It will give you a chance to play with settings and speed.

Step 2: Find your fantasy 

We all have one, whether we choose to share it or not. Deep down inside of you, you know what you want. Whether it is that muscled man in a bungalow by the beach or remembering that time when the perfect tongue was caressing you, bring that to the forefront of your mind. Allow yourself to get lost in your perfect world. Don’t hold back either.

The beauty of pleasing yourself is that you have no pressure to act or respond in a certain way. Envision your perfect pleasure, and then let yourself make it a reality. There is no harm in letting your imagination run wild!

Step 3: Find your setting

Depending on which vibrator you have picked for yourself, there can be a multitude of settings to choose from. They can range from intensity to style, and you will find one that’s right for you. Start on an easier setting, focusing on the area around your clit. Set up your favorite fantasy as you tease yourself.

Once you’re ready you can focus on your clit and start adjusting the vibration and pattern to what feels best for you. It may take time to find out what feels best and that is perfectly okay. Enjoy the journey!

Step 4: Get creative! 

Hitachi Magic Wand Vibrator
The Original Hitachi Magic Wand

There is no rule that a wand vibrator is only meant to stimulate your clit, or that you have to use it missionary style. Grab a pillow and get on top of it! Slowly lower yourself on to your wand vibrator, enjoy the sensations while you keep envisioning that perfect fantasy you’ve built in your mind.

As you get more into your fantasy and your wand vibrator gets deeper inside of you, adjust your settings for the perfect G Spot stimulation. If the pillow idea isn’t for you, you can recreate your favorite sexual positions and hold your vibrator in the right way to give yourself whatever feeling you want!

Step 5: Pause, but don’t stop! 

It can take awhile to really get yourself to the point of climax, especially if you are just starting to learn how to please yourself. Once you feel yourself getting there, pull back just a little bit. Enjoy the sensation and the power that comes from knowing yourself better than anyone else does. Appreciate how you feel as you tease yourself, bringing yourself closer and closer to climax.

Once you simply cannot hold back anymore and you get there – keep going! Many times, orgasms can have a rolling effect and once you have the first one you’ll crave another and another. Our recommended wand vibrators can give you more than one satisfying experience at a time!

Once you master the art of giving yourself multiple fantastic orgasms with a wand vibrator, you will notice a drastic upswing in all areas of your life. Knowing yourself inside and out will help you avoid unsatisfying sexual encounters that you enter into because you need to unwind, and it will help you communicate with your partners to achieve the best experience for both of you!

There is nothing more empowering than giving yourself a lovely date night and finishing it off with the best orgasm of your life.

Frequently Asked Questions

Are wand vibrators discreet?

Since most wand models can be used as massage device for shoulders and necks, they can be considered discreet.

Are wand vibrators waterproof?

Some are, but not all! The best approach is to read the manufacturer’s guide. If waterproof is a deal-breaker for you, make sure you check that first. There is no doubt that waterproof vibrators have many advantages such as being able to use in the bath or shower!

Are wand vibrators efficient in giving you an orgasm?

Yes, they are normally pretty powerful sex toys and can wake up your clit nerve cells very quickly.